My family lived in Stamford, Connecticut until I was about nine-years-old. Growing up on the northeast coast meant we escaped to warmer settings during school breaks. Florida was a big one; Orlando, to be specific.
Then we moved to Texas, and I was almost immediately introduced to the concept of a lake house. It seemed like everyone who was anyone had a lake house. Er, their parents had a lake house. And to befriend these people with lake houses would behoove anyone who wanted in on the lake house life but whose family didn’t have the means to provide one for them.
I never befriended any of these people.
Ironically (but not really at all), lake house people were popular people and popular people were “hot” people and “hot” people were rich people, and not only was I none of those things, I also didn’t attract the type. I went to school in a suburb just north of Dallas in which a lot of rich folk did and still do dwell. Our home was literally the last Dallas exit on the older side of town before you hit all the new money, so that side of things was a bit foreign to me.
The popular girls at my high school had BMWs and Mercedes as their first car.
I had a hand-me-down 1998 Mercury Cougar that would lock up in the rain, rendering me helpless mid-intersection (ask a friend, I dare you).
The same girls had multiple Juicy Couture tracksuits in every pink, purple, and blue hue available.
I saved my money up from my weekend retail job just so I could buy my first and last, and I chose a dark gray (LOL).
Those girls had not one but several designer bags that they carried to school daily.
I didn’t buy my first designer bag until I was 32 and even then, I almost puked in the Gucci store.
So, yeah—I didn’t exactly attract the types of friends with lake houses at their disposal. In fact, I wouldn’t go to my first true lake house until college, where I met new, much better and more grounded people who happened to be lake house-adjacent. And when I finally got to experience the lake house lore I’d heard so much about, I got it.
At a lake house, there are no real rules. It’s swimsuits 24/7, alcohol 24/7, and peak sexual tension. Anything can happen at the lake house, and that’s what makes the whole experience so exhilarating.
It’s like a world within a world at a lake house, especially because they’re usually off the beaten path, buried in a cozy community close to the water.
You realize that these people have a WHOLE OTHER HOUSE they can escape to whenever they want! A built-in vacation home! A completely furnished, super cozy, fully decked out SECOND HOME. It’s wild.
And in Texas, they’re a dime a dozen. Everyone seems to have one.
Except for my family.
And all my friends’ families.
So every Memorial Day weekend for the last 14 years, I’ve stayed in Dallas and watched listlessly as basically anyone I follow who lives in Texas posts from their or their friends’ lake house all weekend-long. No, really. This is a thing. I have spent countless MDW sitting at bars midday, cursing the fact that I didn’t try harder to force my friendship upon lake housians.
I know you can’t tell, but I used to be really bitter about it. That’s dissipated over the years, though. I accepted a long time ago that my fate doesn’t involve a lake house. I gave up my conquest to secure a friend, a man, or even acquaintance with direct access to a lake house that I could visit often. Ideally, over Memorial Day Weekend.
Anyway. Here’s to all those like me reading this, who grew up watching others galavant away every long summertime weekend to the lake while you sat and rotted. And here’s to those reading who were or still are a lake house person—I hope you know how fortunate you are.
WATCHING 📺
We have exactly one episode to go with The Diplomat. I’ve never watched anything quite like it, and I completely get the intrigue. The writing and plot line are so unique, and while the political jargon makes my eye cross and is next to impossible to follow, tension is my second language and there’s LOTS of that. I’m excited to see where it lands and what season two has in store for Kate and Hal.
We also have one episode left of this season of Queer Eye, which is incredibly depressing. They KNOW how much we love this show, and I just feel it’s disrespectful that they don’t provide at least 10 episodes a season. What’s three more? I will never get enough of JVN’s cheerleading, Karamo’s uncanny ability to make people cry, Bobby’s reality-defying house flips, Tan’s tasteful sass, and Antoni’s… um… ability to follow a recipe?
LISTENING 🎧
Speaking of Queer Eye, though, I ranted about Deli Dan’s episode on this week’s podcast episode because there was too much that needed to be said. I also discuss the future of That’s What E Said on this week’s podcast episode, and am welcoming any and all feedback. Listen this weekend while you drive to your lake house or rot at your own house!
I am SUPER late to the game on the Smartless podcast, but MY GOD—I love it so much? I’m not sure why I’ve been sitting on it all this time or why I finally decided to give it a shot, but Will, Jason, and Sean together is a perfect dynamic. I didn’t start at the beginning or anything—I’m pretty much scrolling through episodes and listening to ones with guests that interest me. The amount of shit they give Sean’s off-topic, random tendencies makes me LOL every time they do it. I listened to Ben Affleck’s episode this week, though, and his way of talking is very, um, douchey? Anyway. Yay, Smartless!
MAKING 🔪
I’ve got two delicious recipes to share with you guys this week.
On Sunday, I made this wonderful herby potato salad by Cookie and Kate (one of my go-to recipe sites) that does NOT require mayonnaise, and it was a delight. Super fresh, super easy, and a great side for summertime BBQs (at the lake) (JK).
After watching Mary’s Queer Eye episode (IYKYK), I suddenly had a hankering for shrimp étouffée (a dish I’ve never once had in my life). I decided to look up a recipe and try my hand at it the next night, and HOLY SHIT. GUYS. It was INCREDIBLE. I followed the recipe exactly except I used seafood stock that I found at Whole Foods, and I truly believe this changed the game. It was a phenomenal, hearty, perfectly spicy, wildly delicious dish, and I can’t wait to make it again! Spend with Pennies is another fave recipe site of mine, FYI.
SHOPPING 🛍️
If you’re a paying subscriber, you were served a try-on haul video on Monday featuring my new Madewell gear (speaking of, if you do decide to upgrade, you will have full access to all of my previous paid letters. Good to know, right?!). There’s a 30% off EVERYTHING sale happening until Tuesday 5/30 (code is WARMUP), so now’s your chance to load up on some cute ass summer stuff. Here’s what I got:
The Slouchy Boyjean in Wrightlane wash: I have already worn them 5 times and washed them. They are the jeans of my dreams—flattering but loose and so incredibly comfortable. Madewell jeans already run large, so I’d size down two in these. Ex: I am typically a 29, but take a 28 in Madewell, and took a 27 in these!
100% Goldie Mini Dress in Bluestone: Not my typical silhouette, but was surprised at how cute this was on. It’s an easy summer dress WITH POCKETS and adjustable straps, and I love the neckline. It’s very flattering and doesn’t dig into your armpits, etc. True to size (I took an 8).
Tailor Tapered Pant in Black: I wasn’t sure how I felt about trousers/pleated pants making a comeback, but I am so thankful they have. These are the most flattering ones I’ve tried on, and they came home with me immediately. High waisted, so comfortable, breathable, and flattering—what more could you want? They run large, so size down. I took a 6.
100% Linen Resort Shirt: I’m a sucker for a good, crisp, white button down, and this fit the bill. Love the open notched collar; it creates a very chic, summertime look. True to size (I got a medium).
Striped Rugby Polo Shirt: I’m well aware that buying a long sleeved shirt at this point in time makes zero sense, but fuck it. I’ve been coveting a rugby-style shirt for months now, and couldn’t not get this pink and cream striped version. It’s so chic and perfect. Runs large, so size down! (I got a small).
Knotted Covered Headband: I am a sucker for hair accessories in all shapes and sizes. I’m having a little love affair with blue this season, so I got this headband and am very excited to sport it on my next lazy hair day (which is every day, so).
Outside of Madewell things, I received my new HOKA ONE ONE sneakers in the mail this week and they are even better than I imagined. I’m a loyal HOKA girl; in fact, this is my third pair! I wear them to the gym daily, and they are my only walking/running shoes. There are tons of styles, but Clifton is my shit. I wore the Clifton 8 for a few years, but they’ve updated it and are calling it Clifton 9, which is fine by me because they’re even more comfortable and have new color options. I got the Eggnog/Blanc de Blanc version, but you can’t go wrong with any color. Totally true to size!
I am ~in love~ with Merit Beauty’s Flush Balm Blush. I have the Persimmon color, which is more coral and decided to add the Beverly Hills color to my makeup drawer last week, too. It’s a truer pink-peach, and I wanted both options on-hand depending on the day and the vibe.
I’m very late to the Owala water bottle game and, after walking by the “Lilac” version of this bottle 100 times at Target, I finally just caved. Listen—it’s better than the Stanley. Like, no contest IMO. I love that you can sip or chug, depending. And the color options are SO FUN. I wish I had waited and gotten the “Tropical” online—it’s stunnin’. Maybe next time.
Whether you’re a lucky son of a bitch and are at a lake OR if you’re staying put, I hope you have a gorgeous long weekend. Maybe make some spicy pineapple margs to celebrate? Just a thought.
Talk to you next week,
—EGM
This was fascinating to read as a Minnesotan! Cabin culture is a *biiiig* thing here, and what counts as a cabin varies wildly (we have one with no plumbing or electricity, but there are plenty worth millions). But similar to what you're saying about Texas, the drive to befriend/connect with someone who has a cabin so you can get an invite is strong. Not too many people want to come to our shack though lol.
Never been to a LH, never had any friends with one either. They better appreciate it! 🤣 Also, Smartless? Diehard fan and they have a new show that is more of a documentary of behind-the-scenes of their traveling show they did. It's on Max and it's hilarious.