The ππΊπ§πͺποΈ List
Several new recipes, some non-clothing buys, and a lesson in hardcore parenting
Every day of seventh and eighth grade, I straightened my hair. This was between 1999-2001, so stick straight hair was in and I obviously had to do whatever it took to fit in, even if that meant taking the clunky ass, 20 pound Conair hair straightener to my curls and damaging them for two years straight. It was a way of life.
Right before my 8th grade graduation and subsequent formal entrance into society (AKA high school), I did something to piss off my mom so bad, she took my straightener away. To this day, neither of us can remember what I said or did that made her angry enough to punish me with my own curls, but this hardcore parenting is something Iβve always admired about my mom. She did the same when, around the age of 7, I went searching for our hidden Christmas presents, found them all, admitted my discovery to her because the guilt was too much to bear, and she
TOOK
THEM
ALL
BACK.
Yes, you read that right. She returned every single one of my presents that year. Ellen Golden was never and is still never fucking around. Iβm pretty sure she invented the phrase βFuck around and find out.β When she decided on a punishment, she didnβt budge so I knew I was up shitβs curly ass creek without a straightener for the most important moment of my life to date (my 8th grade graduation ceremony).
I cannot stress enough that I really, truly had no idea how to deal with my curls when I was 13. I was lost. So I did what any sensible 8th grader would do β I brushed them out, pulled them back into the tightest low ponytail that I could, and held my head high. And do you know how my mom rewarded me by taking this punishment so gracefully?
With the Billy Elliot DVD (my absolute obsession at the time).
This is when my journey with my curls began. At 13. Itβs been nearly 24 years since my mom took away my straightener and forced me to face the music of my own genes, and what a wild ride itβs been. Curls are not easy β they are finicky, sensitive, stubborn as hell, and no two are made alike. From ninth grade on, I wore my hair natural and, over the past 23 years, have tried hundreds of hair products and techniques. Iβve visited many hairstylists, some who were curly hair experts and some who only claimed to be. Iβve grown them out, cut them off, gotten bangs, revisited blow outs β Iβve turned over every proverbial stone in search of the right products, method, and cut for me.
And by George, I found it last weekend with Haiya Rodriguez of HER Curls Studio.
I wrote in depth about my experience with her in this past Mondayβs Weekend Digress, so I wonβt be going into detail here. But know this β she is a godsend. After one visit with her and 24 years of searching, I now have the products and technique Iβve been looking for basically my entire life and feelβ¦ powerful.
I donβt remember the last time I said βI LOVE MY HAIRβ to myself, and Iβve been saying it for a week straight now. The pictures above are after my first wash day at home (yesterday), and I am in shock with the results. Any red-blooded female knows that loving what you see when you look in the mirror is the ultimate act of defiance, and I am DEFYING, henny.
If you live in Dallas or LA or Atlanta or New York and you have curly hair and you need a guru, book Haiya immediately. She will change your life.
READING
You *probably* saw my essay about this essay this week, but in case you didnβt, I implore you to read them both as you head into the weekend.
My longtime friend, Kaitlyn Coffee, is the genius behind Harris Vintage, and she also hates β like literally HATES β throw pillows. Sheβs gone on enough rants about this deep hostility toward what she feels to be a worthless piece of decor that D Magazine interviewed her about it and itβs a really fun read.
WATCHING
You Are What You Eat: A Twin Experiment
Twins are just fascinating, arenβt they? In this Netflix series, they take several sets of identical twins and put one on an omnivore diet and one on a vegan diet then see what happens. Maybe Iβm easily convinced, but the results have me questioning my meat consumption in a BIG way. The benefits of being plant-based are, from what I can tell, pretty inarguable (weβre talking the eradication of visceral fat, higher sexual arousal, amongst many other benefits), so Iβm experimenting with veggie-forward dishes at home, which youβre about to witness via my βMakingβ section of this weekβs list. Iβm not saying Iβm done with meat, but I *am* saying meat may become more of an βevery once in a whileβ thing as opposed to all the time.
Weβve been watching this season of Fargo for the last several weeks, and I was waiting for the finale to write it up here. This season was all about strong female leads and weak, oblivious, angry men, and it was beautiful. Juno Temple carried the show so well as the main character, and Jon Hamm made a perfect piece of shit husband. Jennifer Jason Leighβs plastic surgery or whatever sheβs had done to her face is distracting, but not enough to realize what a force she is as her character, and Sam Spruellβs ancient, immortalized hitman steals every scene heβs in. Also, Winston from New Girl is in it! Itβs a great season, very powerful, and highly entertaining. Content warning, though, for domestic abuse/violence.
Zac and I looooove our β90s movies. Neither of us had seen Wag the Dog (1998), so we randomly decided to watch it one night this week. The premise is that the president is involved in a sex scandal 11 days before the election, so a spin team comes in to distract the general public from the scandal so theyβll forget all about it and still vote for him. Itβs a dark comedy, and itβs hilarious yet slightly terrifying because the premise and all the lying and manipulation that takes places behind the scenes to protect the president feelsβ¦ familiar. Robert De Niro is the spin team captain, and Dustin Hoffman plays a big time Hollywood producer who stages a fake war with Albania and considers it the best work heβs ever done. It goes off the rails at one point, but thatβs to be expected. We really enjoyed it.
We watched this 3.5 hour movie in stages. One night for an hour and a half, the next for another hour and a half, then finally one more night for the 28 remaining minutes. This movie is extremely depressing and frustrating. If youβre unfamiliar with the plot, itβs a true story about the Osage tribe finding oil in Oklahoma and coming into a lot of money because of it, and one white manβs (Robert De Niro) mission to kill them all off one by one and collect the fortune. Leo plays a dumb-as-rocks WWI veteran whose lack of intelligence leads to him being very easily taken advantage of and manipulated, and itβs beyond frustrating to witness. He plays it extremely well (they way his underbite is locked in the entire time made me wonder if his jaw was in serious pain throughout the process), but itβs a very different role from his typical Scorsesian character. Lily Gladstone was amazing, but she was no Carey Mulligan in Maestro. And we all know how I feel about her. It was a good movie but probably didnβt need to be as long as it was. Thatβs my final word on it.
MAKING
Like I said, Iβve been going heavy-veggie in the kitchen this week, so hereβs what I made and loved:
Vegan Banana Bread β I was so sure this was gonna taste like ass or, at the very least, be incredibly dry. Wrong on both accounts. Itβs very good, and Iβm still munching on it!
Chana Masala β Ho.ly. shit. This was incredible. Zac and I couldnβt stop raving about it to each other. If you love Indian food and spices, you must make this ASAP. I served it over brown rice and it was beyond delicious. Canβt wait to make it again!
Black Bean Stuffed Sweet Potatoes β I loved this; Zac said it was maybe βa little too healthy.β LOL. The βfiesta saladβ the goes on top of the sweet potato was so good and would taste equally as amazing over some cilantro lime rice if thatβs more your speed. I really enjoyed this dish and was extremely full from it!
SHOPPING
I have a big Abercrombie and SΓ©zane order en route to me right now, so Iβll cover those next week. This week was all about grocery store finds (for the most part):
I am obsessed with all Poppi soda. Itβs just really good when you want something but donβt necessarily want a can of sugar. I tried their latest flavor, βDoc,β which is like their take on a Dr. Pepper and it is surprisingly good. So good, in fact, I loaded up our mini fridge with them!
My sister alerted me to these limited time Hersheyβs Kisses called Roses. Theyβre only around for Valentineβs Day, and they areβ¦ really fucking good. The center is meltaway chocolate, and I DARE you to have just 1 or 2. I got two bags to be safe.
I feel like Iβm always trying to find a really solid store brand salsa. I grabbed a jar of Whole Foods 365 Organic Thick & Chunky Hot Salsa, and itβs pretty damn great. Perfect amount of heat, great consistency, and good price. It may be our new go-to.
Iβm also always looking for better-for-you desserts, and these Caramel Brownie Greek Yogurt bars by Enlightened are SO GOOD? I didnβt expect them to be as tasty as they are; I was legit moaning while eating it. The flavors are potent, and it does not feel or taste like youβre eating Greek yogurt. 10/10 recommend! I found them at our local Sprouts.
The only clothing thing Iβm gonna throw out this week is that if youβre a girl mom/aunt/grandma/whatever and sheβs of the right age, you need to get her this Valentineβs set from Target. Do it for me, please. I walked by it and legit cursed under my breath βI fucking want that.β Itβs so amazing.
Iβll meet you here next Friday for more. Until then, have a great weekend!
β EGM
Just chiming in to say the rhinestone embellished sunglasses (ON THE LENS!) took me right back to a special place in the early aughts. What a time to be alive. We must be roughly the same age, because that was just about the time that I discovered the hair straightener and turned that baby up to the highest heat setting and went to town.
Oh Emma I did what I always do, and read thru so quickly that it didn't register that you DID mention you must have done something major before your 8th grade graduation but couldn't remember what it was. HARD ASS MOMMA is just an ASS MOMMA and needs to slow down when reading. Yikes. Sorry.